As usual my life is full of ups and downs.. Drama here and there.. Well this is life about rite.. I'm seriously very tired now at the moment.. Rainbow that i saw doesn't shine that bright and i can see that it's dull now.. Sometimes i'm seriously sick of everything happened.. I tried my best to improved myself and i know that i'm seriously stubborn.. Spoke to Zong xian(buddy)and both of us got closed together during our ibio class.. A guy that is closed to me for 2 months can see that I'm a serious ego, independent and i act like a guy.. Why can't i just act like a normal girl instead of being so hard on myself.. Sometimes i need someone to pamper with and not to be like a guy.. Sometimes i hide a lot of things deep inside but do anyone knows bout it? You can see that i smile a lot but does it means that im happy deep inside??
When it comes to relationship, I seriously don't know how to please a person and most of the time i take steps at the wrong time.. I just hate myself sometimes.. or maybe.. what goes around, comes around??? Karma?? I sincerely apologize to guys that i hurt before.. Maybe with intention or without intention.. I don't like a guy that take me as a guy instead of gf.. But my bad, i talk like a guy(even though i wear girly clothes), ego and i don't like my bf to overlead me.. wth!!!! Can i please wake up!!!! Fuck me!!!! But seriously, in this 3 yrs i changed a lot.. The past 2 relationships was bad.. I hate myself for being dumb and yet ego.. When i'm in a relationship, i seriously love the person that im with and sometimes i just act dumbly and gives in easily i would say.. Even though i told myself there might be no future but yet why i still wanna give in so much???? I AM SO FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!! Please love me and not hurting me!!!! Plus please don't play with my feelings.. Seriously my heart is super fragile, it will break easily and handle it with SUPER CARE!!!
MY biggest fear at this moment : bad relationship
My biggest dilemma: should i follow what zong xian said to me?? BE more girly and don't be ego or else a guy will treat me like a brother instead of gf...
TELL ME BOUT IT!!!
When it comes to relationship, I seriously don't know how to please a person and most of the time i take steps at the wrong time.. I just hate myself sometimes.. or maybe.. what goes around, comes around??? Karma?? I sincerely apologize to guys that i hurt before.. Maybe with intention or without intention.. I don't like a guy that take me as a guy instead of gf.. But my bad, i talk like a guy(even though i wear girly clothes), ego and i don't like my bf to overlead me.. wth!!!! Can i please wake up!!!! Fuck me!!!! But seriously, in this 3 yrs i changed a lot.. The past 2 relationships was bad.. I hate myself for being dumb and yet ego.. When i'm in a relationship, i seriously love the person that im with and sometimes i just act dumbly and gives in easily i would say.. Even though i told myself there might be no future but yet why i still wanna give in so much???? I AM SO FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!! Please love me and not hurting me!!!! Plus please don't play with my feelings.. Seriously my heart is super fragile, it will break easily and handle it with SUPER CARE!!!
MY biggest fear at this moment : bad relationship
My biggest dilemma: should i follow what zong xian said to me?? BE more girly and don't be ego or else a guy will treat me like a brother instead of gf...
TELL ME BOUT IT!!!
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